Success & Failure

Don't you want to be a successful person? We often strive for success and excellence in the things we do, whether these success are our education, our work, our hobbies, our relationships, our friendship, our Sunday School class, our relationship with God etc...

Rightly so! What is the point of doing things if we do not do anything but the best in all that we do? After all, even non Christian have the saying that goes 'we only live once...' Well technically, I guess Christians live more than once but let's focus on our current lives we have control of. Let’s focus on the present. Let’s focus on the really important stuff. Do our lives reflect nothing but success and excellence when we evaluate our relationship God?

Ironically, I really wish I am able to say yes but I will be lying if I call my relationship with God a complete success. God intends for our relationships with Him to be fully vibrant but I often find myself falling into sins and giving in to temptations that often hurt and discourage me. After realizing what I've chose to do from that temptation and test, I felt regrets and frustrations that I feel as if I wish I don’t have to get myself back up. Have you felt like that from time to time? Falling down and can't picking yourself back up?

I admire Michael Jordan, one of the best basketball players in history. Although we may consider him true baller, he still said in one of his quotes: "I've missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."

Sir Winston Churchill, a Prime Minister of UK who had to face one of the worst wars in history, said the following quote to describe what success is. He said: "Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm."

In our eyes, Michael Jordan and Sir Winston Churchill may perhaps be one of the most qualifying persons who had successfully fulfilled their roles in the things they were assigned to. But even they admitted they had failed so many times. How humbling is that? Even the best has flaws. Then I realize that the biggest difference between myself and them is the attitude towards failures.

God is great to us and He wants nothing but the best for us. God has even comforted us by providing us 1 Corinthians 10:13 to stand under whenever we’re tempted: No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Great... that's wonderful news to know and a couple of weeks ago, I was finally able to figure out why I effortlessly fall into temptation: it was the fact that I'm always hesitant into getting in action. I realize that I'm just too sluggish in all the things I do and even during times of temptation; I was sluggish to look ‘for the way out’ and before I know it, bam, it’s too late. So I've been more conscious to ensure that I act more and hesitate less. (Still learning, as you can see, my blog submission is late.)

But this hesitation and sluggishness leads to my fall as well. I passionately hate it when I fall. (So, yes Ian, I pick on myself pretty darn often.) But I was also comforted last night as one of my friend during our discussion in Bible Study Fellowship (BSF) mentioned the following verse from the Bible 2 Corinthians 12:9: But [the Lord] said to [Paul], "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

In Kung Fu Panda, "There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the "present." May the Lord be with us, in times or our strength and weakness, so that in whatever situations that we are, may we know that God loves us and He is here with us. He wants nothing but the best for us, He wants us to be successful in everything that we do, may we never be discouraged. May we always pick ourselves back up when we fall because we know that God is able to use our entire life, our success and failure, to glorify Him! Amen!

Once when I was little...

It is hard to say what my testimony is, as I don't have one pivotal point in my faith, but rather God has been challenging, uprooting, refining, and reshaping me throughout the narrative of my life. Each of these moments require a mess of explanation and background information. As well, these moments are quite personal to me and I don't feel I could express them appropriately on blog. Perhaps if we find ourselves stuck waiting for a storm to pass and have nothing to do but kill time, we can bring it up then. :P However, right now I'll share about something that shaped my faith from the beginning.

I don't know how much you remember from my dad's sermon a couple weeks back, or if you were even there that Sunday, but he shared about my family's financial troubles. The time when this was the worst was when I was in elementary school. The jist of the story is that when we were in the deepest hole that we had ever been with no more options, God not only answered our prayers in the nick of time, but provided extra to show his amazing grace and love.

When we were struggling, it was not a brief period but a drawn out string of years. Debt grew upon debt, and the situation further intensified. I'm not by any means saying my sisters and I grew up in poverty or anything, but it really did strain the experience of growing up a lot; at a young age, you are made aware of social inequality; your friends ask why you can't do certain things with them, you can't afford to take lessons, your parents say we can't afford to go out to eat, your father comes home each evening on the brink of breaking down not knowing if his pay cheque would stretch to the next month, you barely see your parents because they are both working full time trying to make ends meet, and stress and tension are always high at home. My parents never tried to shelter my sisters and I, but always believed in being honest with us. Even though I was quite young at the time, I still understood the gravity of the situation. Not only are you out of physical resources, but along with this comes a lot of embarrassment and shame; it feels like you are living two identities, and are always trying to hide something from the world, and are constantly reminded of what you cannot afford to have or do. Family/home life were as well often dictated by this burden constantly hanging over us which led to a whole host of other problems (That is a whole other essay in itself :P).

But enough grimness. Let's get back to the good part--> God saved the day :D. I still remember that night so clearly when my father announced to the family that he had just received a cheque in the mail (his best friend had past away and had earlier unofficially had asked his brother to set some money aside for my father); that was my first experience of true brokenness. The family was in tears and praising God with nothing holding them back. The room was filled with a joy and profound thankfulness that cannot be put into words.

Things are much better now, and no I'm not saying everything was happy and perfect after that, but I am saying that I am really thankful for that whole experience. Firstly, it really shaped my character. Yes having things is nice, and having the freedom to do things is nice, but the experience made me realize how unreliable money is and made me see what was important at an early age (the Lord and the people you love). I'm not saying I don't treat myself to things now and then, but I don't place a huge importance on material things (haha-my sister knows I've never cared to marry a rich man). As well, as things were never handed to me, I learned to work hard and value the things that are provided for me. I could go on and on about the things learned, but the most important thing I experienced was the power/goodness/grace/love/care/foresight/provision/almightiness of the Lord. He didn't have to dig us out of our hole, but he chose to. Like the story my father mentioned in the sermon about the widow and the jars of oil, God wants us to be obedient and trust him; even though he could miraculously wipe our problems away, so much more comes from the struggle and having faith/relying on Him completely. When I praise the Lord it comes from a deeper place. Rather than merely knowing what God is capable of, I've felt it in my core. I thank Him that he allowed me to see such a real side of Him.

So, that was the brief version of the story, and a quick peek into God's work in my life. I'm sure some of you can relate, and hope maybe some can find encouragement in it.

Brick Walls

Throughout the past year, I've experienced a fair share of God's goodness through his grace, blessings by his mercies, and most of all, challenges that ultimately showed God's plan for me. Closer to the beginning of this year, as most of you would know, I injured my leg. At first, it was definitely really challenging in many aspects. Feelings of missed opportunities, incapable of independence and time wasted. To me, the injury felt like a huge brick wall that stopped me from doing everything I needed or wanted to do. After the injury settled in and as I began recovery, people around me were immensely supportive. I was unable to do a lot of the physical things I used to do for a good few months, but somehow, I managed to survive school decently, passed my job interview, and above all, realized how much God loved me. The injury was only a brick wall that built my knowledge of who God was and how He shapes and molds us. He taught me the importance of perseverance and trust.


Whats your brick wall experience?